Dear Ones, poor boundaries always lead to resentment. Always. Resentment leads to separation. So, interestingly, people have poor boundaries because they don’t want separation, yet those poor boundaries are what leads to the very thing they are trying to avoid.
Many of you have come to accept that healthy and appropriate boundaries are necessary to the growth and wellness of all, but have trouble knowing when it is appropriate and when it is not.
If you are about to offer help, stop for a moment and ask yourself the following questions. Did the person ask for your help? Do you really want to help, or is it just a reaction to offer out of habit, or a desire to control? Can this person reasonably handle it on their own? Is stepping in your responsibility? Is it being empowering or disempowering to the other person? How do you feel when you think about assisting? Does it make you feel angry or resentful? A good rule of thumb is to never become more invested in another person’s wellness than they are invested in it for themselves.
We understand that you are tender and loving souls and wish to make a difference. Your loved ones know that! Love them enough to be the experts of their own life expression, and love yourself enough to be the expert of your own. Help, when appropriate, and when asked, and you will find your relationships taking on a greater, more appreciative balance. ~Archangel Gabriel